Life is Good

I said that to Julie, the cruise director, last night aboard the Fleetwing II as we shared a cigarette break. This was my second time on the boat as the chef. I'm working as a casual chef for Buffets Galore and I've done four functions with them in the past month. It is after all, the busy season for hospitality in Sydney. It's summer, and company Christmas parties abound. Catering companies are falling over themselves trying to keep up with demand.

Over the past few weeks I have been experiencing depression. I finally moved in with my sister to our new place in Meadowbank. Leaving my old place in Carlingford was more emotionally taxing than I imagined. 11 years and 3 months is a long time to live in the one place, the roots run very deep into my psyche. Sheer inertia prevented me from moving out long after I should have, like after the divorce. Now that I have finally moved, it was not on my terms, and the feeling of powerless-ness (yes I just made up a word) is something I don't care to have to deal with again.

Last Tuesday, in an attempt to shake off my depression I decided to face up to all the things that I have been putting off, like doing my taxes. Within hours after setting an appointment with my tax agent, I got a message from Geoff Hopkins asking if I was interested in doing a short IT project for him writing a few query reports. I could do with the cash so I set that ball in motion. Not long after that I got a call from my agent about an audition for a commercial on Friday.

Friday? Holy crap, according to my diary I have a catering gig on the Fleetwing II! But wait, according to my Google Calendar (TM) it is on Saturday, not Friday. Which is it? So I called my chef Chris, and he told me that he actually wants me to work on the boat both days. It turns out the Friday is an evening cruise so in the end I was able to do the audition.

The commercial is all hush-hush, with confidentiality agreements so I can't say what it's about or which product. But it is my first audition. Ever. After the audition, I thought to myself, that was actually easy. It can't be that easy. Why can't somethings in life be easy? Where does it say that everything has to be hard? Anyway, I don't know yet if I got the part, but I'm proud of my performance. Whatever happens, I don't think I'd ever be nervous about an audition again. I do my thing as best as I can and and it's up to the gods if I get it or not.

So Friday night, during a lull in the service, I'm on the bow of the boat enjoying the harbour breeze with a still mostly full moon. Life is good.

A Tale of Two Cats

I often wonder why people fear dying alone? I think it's because each of our lives is a story, and every story needs a proper ending. Having someone witness our death is equivalent to having someone witness our life. They may have not been there from the start of the show, but they caught the ending. How would you feel if nobody gets to read the final chapter of the novel that was your life?

This is why I feel the urge to tell the story of Kiss-Kiss, the second cat that I mentioned in the previous entry. I cannot tell this story without involving the story of my first cat -Pip.

For Pip the story begins way back when I was just a kid in third grade. It was a rainy tropical night in the house where I grew up. There was a stray kitten mewing at our front door. My parents told me to shoo it away. I tried that. It just came back. So like any other kid, I asked my parents if we could just keep it. They said no, take it to the next block and let it bother someone else. Ten minutes after I got back home, the kitten was back at our front door.

I tried convincing my parents to keep the kitty, they were having none of it, they said to take it out further. I got on my bicycle, rode seven blocks away figuring that would be far enough and dropped off the kitten on the kerb and rode back. It took a half hour for the kitten to find its way back to our front door. By this time my parents were wondering if I had even been taking the kitty past our front gate, maybe I had been lying. They told me sternly to get rid of the kitten for real.

I should say that maybe things did not happen this way. I was just a kid, and over the years maybe I remember it to be more dramatic than it really was. One last time I rode my bike carrying the kitten. I wondered how far I should ride. I also thought about how much trouble I would get into if the kitten manages to find its way back again. There was no way I could prove I rode all this way, I could just as easily been circling the block out of sight.

And then I came upon the creek next to the road. It was all swollen with the constant rain. Without thinking I tossed the kitten into the water. I couldn't stay to watch what I had done. I got on my bike and rode hard all the way home with the rain pelting my face. With each grind of the pedal I was willing my heart to turn into a black stone so that I wouldn't have to deal with this sick feeling. I carried this guilt for many years.

Ten years ago, I came in late to work (as usual) and as I walked past, Dilvo popped his head above the cubicle partition and asked me a question. "Would you like a kitten?" I turned to him and said, "Sure." All the while wondering why I said that without thinking. He explained that a stray had found its way into his garage and that he couldn't keep it because they already have, get this: a dog, a bird, and a goldfish; all of which are incompatible with a cat. I ended up taking the kitten home, and naming him Pip (I was reading Dickens' Great Expectations at the time).

It wasn't easy. My wife, being a dog person, was against it. Our rental conditions specifically prohibit keeping an animal in the unit. Not to mention I would have no idea how to raise and care for one. I argued to my wife that we've been married 10 years and that I should be entitled to one executive decision every decade, and I had made my decision, we're having this kitten.

Upon later reflection I realised that by saving Pip, I am able to let go of the guilt I have carried all these years. My karma books are now in balance, cats killed: 1 vs cats saved: 1. All was good for about two months, and then I ran over a cat on the way to work (it dashed across a busy road in peak hour I swear). Cats killed: 2 vs cats saved: 1. God dammit.

Last May, one of the salsa dancers had to move house and couldn't take his cat with him. DJ Mambo G at the club appealed to all the salsa dancers for anyone who could adopt this cat. I told Mambo G that if no one else steps forward, I would take the cat, you know, to re-balance my karma. No one else stepped forward.

When I picked up the cat, the previous owner explained that he's had her for ten years, that would make her the same age as Pip. They named her Kiss-Kiss because that was how they would summon her by making kissing sounds. She was at least partially deaf, and she was mostly an outdoor cat. She came to be his cat when she was a kitten that followed him home.

Pip is an unusually affectionate cat. He prefers to be in in the room of the house where he can be in the company of people. When he wakes up alone in a room, he would stretch, let out a long meow and start searching where everyone else was. He loved being stroked and touched.

By contrast Kiss-Kiss was almost wild. Imagine being a cat with deficient hearing: things always end up startling you. So I make sure she sees me first before I approach her. Even then if I tried to touch her, she would hiss and bare her fangs. She wouldn't allow more than a couple of strokes before she would snarl and bite your hand. At first I allowed for it due to being stressed in new surroundings and around new people.

Kiss-Kiss and Pip would fight. Often. Cats hate change, and now both cats had just had their happy equillibrium upset. Kiss-Kiss exudes a street-tough air that just screams "Don't fuck with me, I'll CUT you." During their fights, things got broken and Pip would walk off with nothing settled. She was fierce, but he was bigger. I had hoped that one of them would establish dominance and learn to share the territory with the other. In the end, Kiss-Kiss, staked out the balcony as her space. She spent the entire winter huddled up in her wicker basket. Pip would come out periodically just to harass her.

Five weeks ago I received notice that my lease was being terminated on account of the unit having been sold to a new owner. I had to find somewhere else to live. This was going to be a problem, not many places would accept tenants with animals. There was no question that I would keep Pip no matter what happened. I was seriously considering giving up Kiss-Kiss for adoption. I hated the idea of abandoning her just like her previous owner. But she wasn't an easy cat to love, and even now six months later I still refer to her as the other cat.

She must have sensed she was unwanted. One morning three weeks ago, I was in the kitchen washing up over the sink, when Kiss-Kiss jumped on to the balcony railing. She often does this so I wasn't concerned. Next thing I knew was a ball of orange fur hitting the flyscreen on the kitchen window. For some unknown reason she leapt for the kitchen window, even though there was nowhere to land. She fell one storey onto the driveway below. I got out on the balcony to have a closer look expecting her to be injured. She just looked up at me and then walked away. I didn't see her again for two weeks.

Problem solved. When I rescued Kiss-Kiss last May, I took on responsibility for this animal. Even when things weren't working out, I couldn't abandon her. She was my burden. When she ran away, I thought myself absolved of that responsibility. I hadn't abandoned her, she had abandoned me.

Yesterday everyone in the apartment complex got a note in their letterbox from one of our neighbours. In big bold letters it asked DO YOU RECOGNISE THIS CAT? It had a picture of Kiss-Kiss and the note explained that Kiss-Kiss had made their yard its home. They already have a cat so they don't really want another one. They hope the owner would claim it or they will try to find it a new home or surrender it to the pound. I had to laugh, because I remember reading once that the difference between cats and dogs is that people choose their dogs, while cats choose their people.

Now I'm thinking, I was that owner, I took on that responsibility last May. But then she ran away. Now someone else has rescued her and assumed that burden. Of course I can try to rescue her again and resume that responsibility. But what kind of life could I offer her? Cooped up indoors (to hide from my new landlord) and being constantly harassed by Pip.

I wanted to call the neighbours, not to take the cat back, but to tell them the true story of Kiss-Kiss and wish them luck finding a new owner. Thinking more about it, that's probably a bad idea. I'd likely just get saddled with her again, and I'm only one week away from moving out of the complex anyway. Some part of me feels this is a cowardly thing to do, but another part of me is saying, maybe talking to the neighbours is even more cowardly. It would be an attempt to ease my guilt yet not face up to the duty of ownership. Like committing the crime and expecting a pardon.

No. This is probably as close as I will ever get to understanding women who abandon unwanted infants. At the moment, Kiss-Kiss is probably having the best time of her life since I first met her. She is outdoors and free, and she gets fed by the neighbours. Granted there is a risk she'll end up in the pound, however, I know that if I say nothing and do nothing, she still has a chance of finding a new life with a new owner and a new name. She no longer has to be this twice-abandoned cat with a hearing and attitude problem named Kiss-Kiss because its original owners couldn't think of something better.

This is why I tell this story, so that no matter what happens, the story of Kiss-Kiss can get an ending. It's up to the reader to choose if it's tragic (pound) or hopeful (adoption). In my head I hear lines from the final scene of Gone with the Wind.

Rhett Butler: "Frankly my dear, I don't give a damn."

Scarlett O'hara: "... tomorrow is another day."

A Few Events

1. The second cat jumps off the balcony ... and lands on its feet. She gave me one last look and walked off down the driveway.

I felt relieved. Now it was no longer my responsibility, it was its choice to jump. Then I felt pangs of guilt. I accepted responsibility for this animal when I first rescued it last May. But then again what sort of life had it led since in my care? It was always in conflict with my other cat, Pip, who reasonably felt like his territory was being violated by this newcomer.

I didn't see her again for another two weeks, until one night while having a late night cigarette on the balcony, she walked along the driveway, mouthed a silent meow in my direction and went on her way. I thought she looked healthy, and somehow happier. Not bad considering I haven't been responsible for feeding her for a couple of weeks. I let go of the guilt and reassured myself it was better this way. I didn't abandon her, she abandoned me.

When I thought more of it, I don't blame her. For what had I to offer? A lifetime, albeit longer, in captivity. With another cat that hates her guts.

2. I was Turned Down for a Job at a Fancy Restaurant

One of my contacts had given me a lead on a restaurant on Wooloomooloo wharf. I gave the head chef, Robert, my resume and asked for a trial shift. A trial shift is like a chef's version of a second interview. This is when the head chef can make a decision on whether you can do the job as you claim, as well as how you can fit in with his kitchen team. He also gets free labour. However, I also get an idea if I even want to work in that kitchen.

I came in for the shift singing Journey's Don't Stop Believing in my head (been watching the pilot episode of Glee). At the end of the shift Robert spoke to me outside of the kitchen and told me that he needed someone with stronger skills than I currently have. I thanked him for giving me a chance, and asked him what he thinks I should do for my next interview/trial. He said I should maybe try for a smaller restaurant, reading between the lines, I think he meant I should try for something little less fancy.

I was initially disappointed, in fact I was on the verge of despair. I started to doubt myself and wondered if I am really cut out for this sort of work. Then I stepped back from the brink, I thought about how I really worked on that shift. I did everything as best as I can. There was nothing that I wished I could do over. Heck, I was proud of what I did on that shift. Even if it wasn't enough to get the job. Back off Despair! You'll not get me today.


3. I Remembered how to have Fun at a Halloween Pool Party

It was a Michael Jackson themed party, I decided to go for the easiest costume option to go as a Jackson 5 Michael, all I needed was a bow tie and an afro wig. When I got to the party they split us into 6 teams, each team was given a room in the house and a Michael Jackson song to perform to in half an hour. It was like a mini So You Think You Can Dance team challenge. Did I mention that the party was hosted and attended by [mostly] friends I have met dancing?

I was never a big MJ fan myself so I had no interest in anything much more than the moonwalk.
However, I was in a team with a couple of dancers that I truly respect so I was prepared to just follow their lead in the choreography. To my surprise they listened to my suggestions and even took them on board. It was validation that I had some dancing credibility, even if I did struggle with learning new moves. We won. No prize, just bragging rights.

Later in the evening I was sweaty dancing in my shirt vest and bow tie I decided I needed to cool down. No one else has yet gone into the pool, likely because it was a rather cool 18C at this time of the night. But I was hot, and I have had a few drinks. I stripped off down to my trunks, and got myself pushed into the water. First!

After that a half a dozen others joined in. They were just waiting for someone silly enough to start it. I had a great time.

God has a sense of humour

A friend of mine sent me a text message with a contact for a kitchen job in Elizabeth Bay which is the furthest I've ever considered for a job. However, I trust the cosmos, my current nearby and convenient jobs aren't really working out for me so I can take a hint. Sometimes though, the message you think you are getting is not necessarily the message you get.

Over the week-end I confided in my friends about my dilemma, they all told me not to lose faith, that it all works out in the end if I can just hang in there. So went for a trial and interview with this cafe in Elizabeth Bay at 7AM (at least it's an improvement from the 5AM start at the other job). The kitchen was tiny, my old office cubicle was large by comparisson. During the trial I met the current cook, a young backpacker from Canada, only one of us could be in the kitchen at any one time. During the service he would look over my shoulder and walk me through each dish. I was thinking, hey this is easy, I can do this. By 12 noon, Robert the owner told me I can go and to start tomorrow at 7AM. Woo-hoo! I got the job.

On my way back to my car I walked past a few real estate agents and browsed the list of properties available for rent in the area. They were surprisingly affordable. As I drove home I felt my spirits lifted, that yes indeed, things are going to work out.

The next day I showed up for work expecting to put in a full day of work. When the customer traffic trailed off at 10AM, Robert gave me my 3 hours pay and told me he's cutting me as there aren't enough customers. I went home annoyed that the last two days less travel expenses had netted me maybe 20 bucks.

For the rest of the week I moped around worried that I can't survive like this. Add to the fact that I would have to move out of my current apartment since it's been sold to new owners. My faith is wavering again.

On Saturday morning, my sister Marlene rings me to ask me to look at this rental property in Meadowbank, about 4Kms closer to the city than my current address. She was really motivated by fear that she won't get an apartment and is at the point that she'd take any apartment that would have her as a tenant, regardless of how shitty the place was.

I fought to maintain my positive attitude and inspected this apartment. It was at the top floor, my immediate thought was, man this would be a bugger for moving furniture. My second thought though was, but hey I would get fit coming up and down these stairs. The apartment turned out to be pretty good, the primary attraction for me was the timber flooring: Salsa Parties! Overall the place had a good vibe. At that point I knew I could live here.

Marlene was able to catch up just before the agents locked up. She agreed that the place was acceptable. We looked at two other properties that day. I couldn't believe Marlene was considering putting in an application for those shabby units. I realised that her attitude was the mirror that I had been fearing all this time. Desperation. When one does not trust in the universe, you grab the first thing that is available because the likelyhood is that nothing better is going to come along. Dreamers like me believe that the right opportunity will come along. That we deserve something better -because the universe isn't out to screw me.

She put in the application for the Meadowbank unit. And she started scheduling another week of searching for other places, because she didn't trust that she would get the unit. Monday she took the day off to look at other properties ahead of the Saturday crowd. That same day the agents called to let her know her application for the Meadowbank unit has been approved. I just told her, see? The universe works itself out, you got yourself stressed for nothing.

Meanwhile I'm still worried about my income stream. This is the 5th week that I haven't gotten any shifts from About Life (my casual employers). I went to the Elizabeth Bay cafe this morning even though Robert did not call me in. It was a long drive but I was trusting the cosmos. Robert told me to go home, that he would call me if he needed me.

I tried to salvage my trip to the city. I tried contacting a girl I know who lives in the area for an impromptu breakfast. She said not on such short notice. I took a walk at Rushcutters Bay park and set on the bench for an hour watching personal trainers, joggers and dog-walkers go about their lovely little Eastern Sydney lives, with just a touch of envy. But then I took stock of where I was, I have my whole day free in front of me. I don't have to be stuck at work. I can sit here as long as I want and enjoy this beautiful spring day. One more cigarette and I was bored already.

Last Thursday night I walked past this pawnshop in Chinatown and saw a second hand Vestax(tm) mixer (the DJ'ing kind, not the baking kind) offered for $219. At the time I thought that was a good price and it would make a good upgrade to my DJ rig. Well since I was going to have to go through the city on my way home, I decided I was going to check out the pawnshop. When I got there, the Vestax was gone. I knew it was a good price.

When I got home I realised the personal trainers and joggers have inspired me to work on my fitness. Since I wasn't trapped at work, I have all the time to use the gym. In the end I decided that THAT was the purpose of my trip to Elizabeth Bay. Not to work, not to go on a date, not to buy a Vestax mixer, but to commit to looking after my body.

Just like any fine tool, this body that I have been gifted with needs deliberate maintenance to be able to perform the tasks that I demand of it: dancing, cooking, diving, snowboarding, acting, etc.

And guess what? This afternoon, I got a call from the agency for a gig on Monday. Apparently I'm doing a KFC commercial. On the one hand I am committing to fitness, and on the other I'm getting paid to promote deep fried Kentucky goodness. The universe is not out to get me, but the universe is filled with irony.

Crisis of Faith

I'm being given a reality check and it bounced. This blog is about my new and exciting journey into a new life, a new way of living, a great adventure. If this was a movie, this is montage part where I'm struggling to pursue my dreams and it's getting hard.

My landlord is selling my home and in all likelyhood I will be forced to move. No problem you say, just find another place. However, before I can find another place I have to lodge an application and when they see that I'm producing a payslip that doesn't even make the cost of the rent per week, it's a fair bet I won't be taken in as a tenant. Even worse if I apply for a mortgage to try and get off the rental treadmill.

For the first time since I left the I.T. industry I just checked the job ads for my I.T. skills. They're offering about $80K a year. Oh so so soooo tempting!

Is this what it boils down to: Be a dreamer and risk being homeless? Or give up the dream and have material security?

Is the cosmos sending me a message? Or is it putting me through a test of faith?

Orange Dawn

We live in an amazing time on an amazing planet. This morning I woke up and looked out the window to an orange sky. My first thought was, I must have something in my eye, I tried to rub my eyes and yep the sky was still orange. Freaky! Let's go wake up my daughter Alex just so she doesn't miss out on this strange phenomenon.

You know what else is cool? Thousands of conversations happening around the world about the event on facebook, twitter, skype! Maybe 5 years ago this would have been reported on TV news and that's that. But in 2009? Not only is the mainstream media reporting this event, but ordinary people are connecting with each other and reporting in real time! Just think about it:

You're checking your facebook and notice all your Sydney friends uploading pics of red sky, links to news articles, and videos. You then call them on your mobile phone (or Skype) and bingo! You have your very own personal local correspondent giving you a live feed! Don't tell me that isn't cool.

One other thing I am observing is that after the ooh-ing and aah-ing at this fascinating once in a lifetime event, reality kicks in. People are bitching about flights being canceled, the clean-up of the dust covering their furniture and carpets, and difficulty breathing. I've been clearing my throat every couple of minutes, and someone even proclaimed digging out orange snot.

I'm thinking of today as a gift, I'm one of the few on the planet who happened to be at the right place at the right time. Even if I do have to whip out the vacuum cleaner again tomorrow. Totally worth it.

*link to flickr gallery of the orange dawn

My Dilemma

I've intended for this to be a chronicle of my journey into my new life. And believe me, I want it to be as honest and as frank with you as I am with myself. This is really how things sound in my head when I tell the story of my life, which I believe to be an open book. In fact, maybe that's what my book will be about.

However, as open as I am about my life, my feelings, my dreams and hopes, it always involves my relationships with other people. It's occurred to me that, these people in my life may not share my belief in telling my story in so public a forum as a blog. I find that I am also honour bound to protect their privacy.

Since I am publishing this as myself Michael Mencias instead of say hotfunkystud1447, my friends would know who I am talking about even if I disguise the names and places.

You know what I have decided? This blog is about me! It's not about you. Sure eventually you may be mentioned, but only as a cameo or a recurring role. And remember that how I write about you is my own personal view of you which I do tell you to your face anyhow -in front of witnesses. So let's get back to talking about me. This is my world. My Leap of Faith.

Serendipty

Today we went to Paraparaumu 50kms from Wellington and met Jay's family: wife Helen and their three children Isabella (8), Cricks (7), and Catalina(6). They are awesome geeky little girls who play in SecondLife and SIMS3. To show my appreciation for Jay's family I offered to cook a 3 course lunch for them. We had stuffed mushrooms for starters, grilled salmon with lemon butter sauce, baked pumpkin, spinach and capsicums for mains, and leche flan with fresh strawberies for dessert. The flan was nearly burnt, but otherwise the meal went down quite well.

After the lunch Lindy called her Wellingtom friend Pania so we can maybe catch up. It turns out she's in Paraparaumu as well and we agreed to meet at the beach. Meanwhile, Lindy and I were strolling past the Kapiti Social Club where I overheard a woman say to an intercom that she was there for Salsa. Did she just say Salsa? I spent a half hour on the net and called a NZ number to be told that there is no Salsa in Wellington until Thursday! It turns out this woman does a weekly Salsa class and social at the Kapiti club every Sunday 4-7PM. So Lindy and I went up and had a few dances before meeting up with Pania at the beach.

After hanging out with Pania, we headed straight on downtown to Wellington and hope to catch some nightlife like a bar, restaurant, or cinima. We ended up in Circa Theatre at the waterfront we watched an improv show held by ImprovFM for NZ$12 each. Just think about it: live theatre for $12 (even less if you convert to AUD), shit I spend more to watch a movie!

It was very serendiptous to be in the same place as Pania when she would normally be 50Kms away, that we were able to find Salsa in such an obscure place as Paraparaumu beach on the three hours of the one day a week we could have found it!

Looking forward to more cosmic setups tomorrow.

Adventurer

I'm in Wellington staying with Jay Montilla. I haven't seen him in about 4 years, it feels serendipitous that I am visiting him now. Like me he's just left his job and is finding a new way of living his life. Not bound by the rules of conformity to how people thought you should live life. We have finally learned to become ourselves.

This morning I woke up at 4AM in Lindy's place. We set out for our early flight into Christchurch. The night before I convinced Lindy we should go visit my friend in Wellington so we booked ferry tickets via the internet*. We got to Christchurch at 1230PM local time, got our hire car at a little past 1PM leaving us a very tight deadline to get to the Ferry in 4.5hrs over 338Km of the South Island's stunning vistas.

As soon as we got in the car, we fixed up the iPod first before the GPS navigation. We had our priorities right eh? We sped North to Picton and was one of the last 10 cars to check in for the last ferry to Wellington that night. Called Jay to let him know and he warns us that the ride could be rough across Cook Strait. It wasn't.

The ferry was an impressive ship, it took rail cars in the bottom deck, cars and trucks on the main deck, and then the passenger decks above. We were hungry so we had dinner on the ferry. After that we found a desk with a power point and watched movies on my laptop. I stepped out on to the outside deck in the middle of the 92km crossing and was amazed at how black everything was was in open sea at night. We only realised we were in Wellington harbour as we were surrounded by the city's lights twinkling in the distance.

We just got back into our cars and drove off as soon as the ferry had docked. Then it was the GPS guiding us all the way to Jay's house.

Tomorrow we will be a new adventure.

____

* I am amazed at how travel has become so easy to organise in today's internet age. Think about it. As of Monday I had no clue I was going to travel. By Monday night I had already booked my rewards plane ticket to Christchurch; Tuesday I had hired a car with roofracks, snowchains, and GPS, Wednesday I had travel insurance sorted; Friday night I had contacted Jay to let him know we were coming, and I booked the ferry passage. And here I am now typing this blog entry using Jay's connection. SO so so so COOL!

Procrastinator

I admit it, I'm the biggest procrastinator. I mean, why do things today when you can put it off for tomorrow? I gotta leave some for later right? Who am I kidding? If it is a difficult and unpleasant task, it goes to the end of the queue, all the cool and fun stuff gets higher priority. That way if I die suddenly, I've managed to go get that sky-diving certification before I got to weed my garden.

Today I wrote that letter to my real estate agent begging them to let me keep my cats. Now it is all in the hands of the gods. Meanwhile now I get to watch DVDs, read my book, and go out dancing knowing that I have gotten that scary unpleasant task out of the way.

See how it works is that these annoying tasks are put off until they can no longer be put off and have become a top priority preventing me from doing all the cool and fun stuff I want to do.

Start in the Middle

You are starting in the middle of the story. My name is Michael and I am a chef -as well as a writer, salsa dancer and DJ, and an actor, and a massage therapist, and a former programmer and IT analyst. Okay I got a lot of interests. We'll cover them as we go along.

Today I was feeling a little overwhelmed and nearly depressed. I have this problem you see. My landlord wants me to get rid of my cats after I got busted during an inspection last week. It was my fault, I forgot about the inspection. In the last ten years I have always made arrangements to conceal my cat whenever an inspection is due.

I have four options:
-give away my cats
-give away my cats temporarily and get them back once the heat is off
-ask my landlord to let me keep the cats
-move out

I'm leaning towards trying for the third one and revisiting my options if that doesn't work. I'm tired of lying. I have to trust the universe that it is pushing me in the right direction.

Just today the universe has given me a pleasant surprise. I haven't gotten a shift at my work (aboutlife.com.au) since Tuesday and it looks like I won't have a decent income this week. But just an hour ago my mentor at TAFE called me and offered me a catering gig for this Saturday. Of course I accepted. I really shouldn't have stressed out and just allow my life to unfold according to the cosmic plan, not according to my plan. Although, sometimes we both have the same plan and that is humbling when that happens.

Speaking of the cosmic plan, one of my friends invited me to go dancing tonight. I hadn't planned on it but it seems the universe is giving me a sign. So off to dancing tonight for me! I'm looking forward to what happens now.