Bucket lists and letting go

 These days when people mention bucket list it's more like a list of experiences that with enough time and money may be ticked off one by one.  I was in university when I came up with my bucket list. In a conversation with Marie Grace she said to me that there are only two guaranteed  ways to be remembered even after we are dead. One is to have a child, the other was to write a book. Those would be good on my bucket list. So over the conversation I arrived at my bucket list in no particular order:

• have [and raise] a child
• write a book
• learn to fly a plane
• learn to scuba dive
• learn to ride a horse
• travel the world
• climb a mountain
• learn a new language
• learn to dance
• learn to sail

Over the decades I have ticked off all but two*.  I noticed that it was skills and accomplishments that are on the list. I logged over 30 hours flying a Beechcraft Skipper, 12 of them solo. I was satisfied that I had accomplished what I set out to do. Also, maintaining a pilots license current wouldn't be cheap and I had more to do yet.  So I traded my David Clark flex boom headset with gel-filled earseals for a Shoei racing helmet (I needed one to go on the track with my WRX).  My flying days are behind me and I was okay with that.

Today I parted with my Cressi BCD, Mares regulator and occy and  Oceanic Dive computer. My diving days are behind me.  I must have done over 50 dives, filled up two logbooks, never bothered to buy the third. I am satisfied that I have met this achievement.  Besides, I could always hire gear when I go again. Having my personal gear was nice but not essential. It was time to let them go to a new adventurer for fresh adventures. Now I feel so much lighter.

The thing is, earlier in my life as I was scything my way through the bucket list, the thought occurred to me.  Why not just keep adding to the list?  It was a young man who came up with the list while goo-goo eyed over some co-ed. He thought 10 was a good number (digits, toes, commandments, etc.)  and seemed achievable in a lifetime. In the end I decided against topping up the list as it felt like cheating,  and potentially the hard ones will get skipped over in favour of easier ones.  

However, if we accomplish all, we can certainly come up with a new list. 

There's some stuff I've hung on to like my parka and snow pants, because I don't ever want to hire those. Snowboarding wasn't even on the list, but that didn't stop me trying it anyway.  There's a heap of stuff I could have added to the list, but never got the chance.  Doing hot laps at Oran Park and Eastern Creek would have snuck in, being in a feature film with a speaking role, being a chef, etc. 

That young man was limited. He'd be blown away with what we've accomplished thus far, as well as laugh at what we've fucked up. It would be nicer if I could tell him we've done it all as well as the bonus achievements**.

*It's down to becoming an author and a horse rider. 

 **Might have to explain that to someone from 1984.

America I See You

 A gloved fist knocks on the door. 

"Federal agents, open the door."

Someone opens the door and sees a group of men in black combat fatigues with the letters ICE emblazoned front and back. 

"We're just here to check on your documentation and all who reside on the premises".

We firmly assure you there are no Jews I mean  undocumented migrants hiding in the cellar.

So do we all believe what's happening today?  We are going through the biggest upheaval in geopolitics since an actual global war. And that was settled with nukes!

After six years of world war fought brutally over land, air, and sea that saw millions die,  America stood over the humbled Japanese and said "Who's next?  Who else wants to challenge America?"  

Apparently, there were a few takers like Cuba, Vietnam, and Libya just to name a few. 

For the next seventy years though, big strong America has your back -as long as you let them in to do business.

If you didn't?  Well, you must be communist and don't believe in capitalism.  Maybe we need to be talking to someone else. Hey CIA, get us a more pro-American, I mean pro-business president for this shithole country.  

That was fine.  At least America got to observe and approvingly declare that it witnessed a fair and free election. And America gets to talk to someone more pro-business, I mean pro-freedom. Isn't that the same thing anyway?

Business as usual until 2016 when the Americans elected a TV star as president (with significant meddling from the Russians).  They voted him out in 2020, which he tried and failed to insurrect.  But  then in 2024 they elected a convicted felon and sex offender. TV star and also former President, but with an even more impressive resume which now includes porn-star fucker and insurrectionist.

So the Americans decided to give Donnie another shot at it because, uhm life was better four years ago? I mean what can be more American than being given a second chance?   

Maybe this time he'll come through for us and we won't be conned.  

You gotta believe me.

These are my documents!  You gotta believe me Mr ICE officer, sir.

Which dystopia are we living in now?

The international community is aghast at the realisation that , NO, America hasn't got your back. 

America wants your land, your minerals, and access to your markets but tariffs your products. America is in it for America only.

You cannot trust Uncle Sam anymore,  he will take your wallet, side with your enemies, and deny you protection.  

Our dystopia wasn't created by robots, zombies, or aliens.

Turns out it's Nazis.  Who would've  guessed?

ps. And I give credit to my graphics team at Leonardo.Ai for their images above using the prompt "a dishevelled but defiant Uncle Sam on the foreground with a flaming desert backdrop showing smoking ruins in the horizon" Wouldn't  let me use mushroom clouds as the AI guardrails won't allow depictions of violence, and I wholeheartedly agree. Isn't it refreshing to find AI that's more sensible than some humans?

The Kindness of Strangers

 

Today was a big day.  I was going to teach tonight's class without a follower assisting, and it's gonna be a big class, and the new cafe annex the class will be in is halfway under construction.  So I just needed to finish my delivery run, get home, get showered, pack the gear and get to the venue.

I returned to the van in downtown Leura to find my rear tyre was flat.  This is my fifth flat tyre on the job so I knew the drill.  First task is to loosen the nuts.  I slipped the cross-wrench on to the first nut and twisted.  It wouldn't budge, not surprising actually, so I tried stepping on the wrench to give my full weight getting maximum torque.  Usually this works. 

I was stumped and pulled out my phone to call for help. At this time a bystander, a courier from another company, offered to help.  

So I said, thanks sure go for it, and this young fella in matching hi-vis grabbed the cross-wrench and twisted. We heard the nut creak and then turn.  I said wow, that's great,  could you maybe just loosen them all for me and I can manage the rest.  Pretty please.  The strapping lad obliged, and when he got all 5 nuts loosened, I shook his hand, thanked him.  

The universe sent me an angel to get me past an obstacle.  Thank you.

Later tonight, we set a new record for the largest class I've ever had in Katoomba at 22 students. There was a reason I got assigned an angel today, all these people were relying on me making it to class !

Surfing the cosmic waves

 No wonder my life has been so crazy lately, my astrologer friend reminded me that we have a full moon occurring simultaneously with the Aussie  winter solstice, and the kicker is that the moon is in Capricorn (my sign) and also year of the Dragon (also me), so okay then.

I hadn't had time to mourn for Divina Black as I had places to be and people to see.  I needed a new ride ASAP. Up until now I was counting on getting a courtesy car while the garage repaired my car. 

However, now I had to change tack  and go car shopping instead.   I had access to $5k for emergencies and this qualifies.  Within 2 hours I followed leads and contacted 2 candidates.   Now I just had to wait for them to get back to me, meanwhile I dashed to the bank for the cash. The wait  was agonizing as the last rays of  the afternoon started to fade. Just before I could call it a day, I got a call that the car was ready if I still wanted it.  

The short story is that I was satisfied with what I was getting for the money,  so I don't think about maybe the other car was a better offer.  Dude,when we asked for auditions, this one showed up and got cast. 

 I handed the cash over and I became the new owner of a 15  year old Honda CR-V with 300,000km of road experience and flaking paintwork  typical of mountain cars parked outside over many frosty mornings and scorching summers.  On the plus side she has rego till next year, new tyres, and runs like new.  

Everyone please meet Lana. Long may she serve.

From Tuesday, I've been feeling this uneasiness in my gut. It seemed like I couldn't see more than a few steps in front of me.  As things unfolded and developed, I had to react and change my objectives. Luckily, my delivery shifts were uncharacteristically brief and freed me up to chase up mechanics, towies, sellers, and wreckers.   Yes, Divina's inert shell has been consigned to the auto recyclers. 

Until emerging on Thursday with Lana,  I all I could do was solve the immediate problem confronting me.  I felt like I was a Jedi using the force to ride the cosmic vortex of Lunar and Solar cycles.

For landing arse-first into a successor vehicle, I am most grateful.

Adios Divina Black

Back in 2012 we named our Subaru Outback family car, she was Divina Black. A fun, versatile and mostly reliable wagon; batteries die, engines overheat, tyres blow out but the NRMA or even myself can always get us back on the road to resume our journey.

Forty-eight hours ago, Divina overheated on the climb to Glenbrook.  She had enough momentum to coast to stop under a street lamp safely off the highway.  My efforts to revive her were futile.  I had to call the NRMA to send a tow truck.  It was 1 AM when we got home, and it's only 5 hours before I had to get up and start my work shift.  It took ages for me to finally fall asleep.

I finished work early afternoon and canvassed a couple of repair shops.  At this point I still thought Divina can be revived by professionals,  but they can't do anything unless I can take the car to their shop.  So I tried calling some local towies, their voicemail greeting recommends sending a text message.  I guess this makes me rather old-fashioned, but  I suppose it also filters out the time-wasters.  So one of them replies texting their tow truck is out of order (so who tows a towie?) Then another texts he can do it for cash.  I ask how soon?  40 minutes.  Ahh the shop closes in 30 minutes, how about tomorrow?  Done.  

Today I completed my delivery shift and went straight to the repair shop hoping for good news.  I saw Divina on their driveway.  When I finally spoke to the mechanic I was told the engine was cooked and cannot be saved.  Divina was gone.

Delivery Skills

 For Noche Buena* this year I decided to make felafels.  I learned to make them 13 years ago doing cooking gigs in Chatswood.  Soaked dry chickpeas are put through the food processor with fresh parsley, coriander, onions, garlic, and spice seasoning.  The resulting mush is then hand formed into felafel balls and get chucked into the freezer.  I had the ingredients, dusted off the food processor, but the pressure point was finding space in the freezer.  

So I decided maybe I can repack the freezer and if I have to, I'll just defrost and consume what won't fit back in once the felafels are in place.  To my pleasant surprise, I was able to fit everything in even with the felafels!   It was then I realised  that I had been honing my packing skills for over 2 years and it has just manifested.  Another Tetris win!  

Tomorrow I make the yoghurt mint dip.

*Traditional Filipino midnight feast on Christmas Eve  (we Filipinos don't see the point of wasting the first 3 hours of the holiday)

Life in the Pelepens

Day 10 

My dad and my mom were avid bowlers (tenpin).  Trophies crowd the top display shelf in the living room.  I thought it would be a great idea for us to go bowling, my mom, and my niece took me to Southmall for that.  My mom forgot to take her ball but brought her own shoes (of course she had her own custom ball and shoes),  so she had to make do with the house balls.  Meanwhile my niece and I has the house shoes and ball.  I merely took that as my mom playing against us with a handicap.  I came out guns blazing, with a score of 124 on the first game, but I only managed a 99 and 102 on the next two.  It was heartwarming for me to watch my 86 year old mom still beat me on the third game, she took two games to warm up after years of not having hit the lanes.  

Day 11

We went to visit my dad's grave in Parañaque.  I haven't been since his funeral seven years ago.  I like browsing through the other graves and tried to imagine the lives that were lived by its occupants and the implied stories behind some of them like a husband and wife who died only 7 days apart -the wife only lasted a week without her partner.  Some plots had family members dying on the same date suggesting some sort of accident or calamity had claimed their lives on that fateful day.  Most notable however, were the number of fresh gravestones for those who had perished between 2020 and 2022, a poignant testament of the devastation wrought by the COVID-19 pandemic.  Rich or poor, young or old, few families were exempt from this global calamity. 

. . .

By evening, the temperatures have cooled down a bit, also partially due to rains brought about by a typhoon passing through the north of the country. I went for a bicycle ride around the old neighbourhood as I once did when I was a child.  This unleashed a flood of childhood memories. I rode past homes of old friends and crushes that have long changed hands and / or  been renovated or knocked down and rebuilt with bigger and more modern designs.  Trees that were mere saplings back then have matured and their roots cracked walls and paved sidewalks.  Once when I was eleven, a dog chasing me caused me to fall over and graze my knees.  However, I wasn't too concerned tonight when two dogs started chasing my bike, if it comes to it, I'd use the bicycle as both a shield and a weapon. Besides, they weren't too serious and gave up as soon as I was outside their territory.  My ride lasted all of 25 minutes, and I had gone down every street of phase one  of our subdivision -Amelita to Imelda, Lovely to Friendly and everything in between.  I got home with a smile on my face, who knows when I might be able to do this again.

  

Day 12

The week since I got here, I've been following two local news stories.  They are both about off-duty law enforcers pulling out their firearms during a road rage incident.  In  both cases, the offenders were trying to assert their authority against the object of their rage. And in both cases a passing motorist had pulled out their smart phones and recorded video of the altercations.  Both videos have gone viral and there was understandably public outcry against the blatant abuse of power.  In the past, all this would have just been quietly swept under the rug, and their law enforcement brothers would have helped with the cover up. That's no longer possible in today's world of social media because the evidence is now in the public sphere and the public expect consequences.  The newspaper today reports that in both incidents, the offenders have lost their jobs and their right to carry firearms. They were clearly not the guys you want roaming the streets armed. Even more satisfying is that the investigating cops who were allegedly willing to let them get away with it are also facing consequences.  Well done Filipinos, I am heartened by the progress of this society who are now excercising their power to hold these abusers and enablers of abuse accountable.  They are finding out that the dildo of consequences arrives unlubricated.